If we had anything so hackneyed as a mission statement at Archelaus, it would probably revolve around the idea of keeping ourselves well amused by producing smart, sophisticated, pleasantly peculiar cards that will delight our many fine customers.
But since we don't have anything like that, the less said about the matter, the better, really.
So, who are we anyway? Well, on the creative side, it would be fair to say that Archelaus employs mostly hopeless degenerates who are well known to the police. On the business side, however, we hire only upstanding citizens of the most outstanding probity. So, there's nothing to worry about, folks, honest! Just relax, order a few fine cards, and go back to sleep.
Don't want to buy online? No problem. Patronize one of the fine merchants who carry our cards instead!
If you are yourself a fine merchant who would like to carry our cards in your retail establishment, please allow us to direct you to our wholesale portal.
If instead you wish merely to be entertained, the Archelaus archives contain many diverting items. On the other hand, if you wish to be deeply bored, our various official policies are also available for public inspection.
Whatever your desires, we hope this page, such as it is, has quenched your thirst for knowledge about our modest enterprise, but if not, you could always seek enlightenment through the FAQ. You could keep an eye on our Facebook page. Or, if you are really desperate, you could always e-mail us. You could even join our mailing list in the hope that it might yield some insight, although frankly that doesn't seem very likely.
P.O. Box 4942
Washington, D.C. 20008
In business since 2005,
in case that impresses anybody.