Ruination & Despair

The Archelaus occupation force in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, continues to grind the population under its heel liberate additional portions of the city. In their latest heroic victory, high-ranking Archelaus field officers have accepted the unconditional surrender of the Dragonfly, a purveyor of vintage goods and gifts in Milwaukee’s attractive Brady Street neighborhood. Archelaus cards are expected to go on sale in this establishment within days.

Aware of my professional interest in unsavory things of this kind, Dr. Hurlbutt has kindly lent me his copy of Das perfide Albion, a German propaganda pamphlet from the First World War. Written by a minor pan-German activist named Alfred Geiser (1868-1937), this work dates from approximately 1915 and includes a number of fiercely anti-British cartoons, some of which seem worth reproducing here for their historical and artistic interest. (Continue reading . . .)

In Wisconsin, detachments of Archelaus troops advancing north from Milwaukee and south from Egg Harbor are converging upon the town of Manitowoc, on the shores of Lake Michigan, in order to seize control of LaDeDa Books & Beans.

In North Carolina, airborne forces are about to land on Ocracoke Island in the Outer Banks, with the goal of storming the Island Ragpicker gift shop.

A certain amount of devastation is to be expected in both instances.

We are frequently asked by well-wishers (or at least I hope that’s what they are) how Archelaus is weathering the current economy. I am pleased to report that the answer is “surprisingly well, thank you.” Indeed, those of you who follow this blog should have noticed that we have undergone a considerable expansion since the National Stationery Show in May. We have not detected any slump in sales at the local open-air markets we attend, either. To the contrary, out of the 112 markets we have gone to over the last four years, nine of our ten highest grosses have occurred since last October.

It must be acknowledged, however, that the recession has caused cashflow problems for some of the fine merchants who carry our cards. As a result, a few of them (and they know who they are!) have fallen behind in paying their invoices. We are struggling to find the right balance between being understanding about their difficulties and insistent about demanding our hard-earned money.

It is clearly a tough time for retailers generally. Today I took a walk through the cluster of stores surrounding the Cleveland Park Metro entrance, and I counted eleven empty storefronts, meaning that about one out of every seven retail spaces is currently vacant. A twelfth shop had a sign in the window stating that it would be closing soon. Of course, Cleveland Park is a comfortably well-off sort of neighborhood. If it were not, no doubt things would be much worse.

God save me from a red-haired Lombard, from a black-haired German, from a fair-haired Spaniard, or from a Fleming of whatever hair-color.

Source: Michael Baxandall, Painting and Experience in Fifteenth Century Italy, 2d ed. (Oxford, 1988), 57, 166.

Although Life’s cartoonists traded freely in offensive ethnic, racial, and religious stereotypes, they could set these aside when necessary to go after bigger game, such as contemporary women’s fashion.

This tartly observed cartoon by “M.C.G.” appeared on December 7, 1899.

I hate to intrude on Dr. Hurlbutt’s territory here, but the logs of our webmaster, Caligula, have recorded the names of what seem to me to be some rather peculiarly named localities, from which visits to our site have originated. For example:

• Apalachicola, Florida
• Floyds Knobs, Indiana
• Swampscott, Massachusetts
• King of Prussia, Pennsylvania
• Spartanburg, South Carolina
• Flower Mound, Texas
• Sugar Land, Texas
• Broken Arrow, Oklahoma
• Bullhead City, Arizona
• Horseheads, New York
• Horse Cave, Kentucky
• Bat Cave, North Carolina

Frankly it is also at least a little disconcerting to encounter a visit from:

• Dachau, Bavaria, Germany

Archelaus’s conquering legions continue to sweep all before them!

In North Carolina, our forces are now ready to push into historic Wilmington, where the Two Sisters Bookery stands undefended in the Cotton Exchange shopping complex.

Innocent civilians are advised to take cover.